Like Ice... Numbing...
I just woke up and it's 3:23pm now. I practically wasted more than half my day sleeping. I feel so spent. My biking episode with Jaycee yesterday left me with scratched legs, a bruised knee and an elbow that's badly bruised and scraped.
I thought I could escape you. I thought I could avoid thinking of you. It just proves that I'm not safe even when I'm asleep.
You were there again. You've been in my dreams for the past week and I've been losing so much shut-eye because of that. I don't want to admit it and I've been trying to hide it... I can't help it. I can't deny the fact that I miss you so much.
Whenever I hear your name, I feel so many things. I feel so ecstatic, yet so melancholic... I feel so excited, yet so disappointed... I feel like I could jump off some building out of sheer happiness and at the same time I feel like slinking off to sulk in some corner away from everyone.
I'm not forcing it... I'm not forcing anything... It's just in me to be like this. When everyone has said everything they could, what happens then? When all pieces of advice have been exhausted, then what? You can only listen to so much right?
Will you ever listen to me? I wonder if you'll ever see through this facade.
I've been trying to observe myself these past few days. People say I'm just too nice for my own goddamn good. Is this true? What is my real side then? What personas could I be hiding away from the world I live in? Perhaps I'm destroying myself... slowly...
I guess I'm only good for laughs then. I'll always be the funny, silly nice guy anyway. I'm not worthy of anything else. I will always be the missing piece, the other half, the insignificant other...
...
How do you not get hurt?
I thought I could escape you. I thought I could avoid thinking of you. It just proves that I'm not safe even when I'm asleep.
You were there again. You've been in my dreams for the past week and I've been losing so much shut-eye because of that. I don't want to admit it and I've been trying to hide it... I can't help it. I can't deny the fact that I miss you so much.
Whenever I hear your name, I feel so many things. I feel so ecstatic, yet so melancholic... I feel so excited, yet so disappointed... I feel like I could jump off some building out of sheer happiness and at the same time I feel like slinking off to sulk in some corner away from everyone.
I'm not forcing it... I'm not forcing anything... It's just in me to be like this. When everyone has said everything they could, what happens then? When all pieces of advice have been exhausted, then what? You can only listen to so much right?
Will you ever listen to me? I wonder if you'll ever see through this facade.
I've been trying to observe myself these past few days. People say I'm just too nice for my own goddamn good. Is this true? What is my real side then? What personas could I be hiding away from the world I live in? Perhaps I'm destroying myself... slowly...
I guess I'm only good for laughs then. I'll always be the funny, silly nice guy anyway. I'm not worthy of anything else. I will always be the missing piece, the other half, the insignificant other...
...
How do you not get hurt?
posted by E.Z. at 6:58 AM
4 Comments:
that's a verrrrrryyy good question. how do you not get hurt?
-your everloving niece
things happen for a reason..
play with fire. :) haha. then you'll die. you won't get hurt after. :) ahihi. tama? tama. :p
PLAY WITH FIRE??? Then I'll DIE??? YOu're morbid. haha who's this?
Yeah, I guess things happen for a reason.
Yeah, it's almost impossible not to get hurt.
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